Have you written the business English letter correctly?

　　Do you often need to write English email in your work? What are your challenges? This issue will introduce you to some common sentence patterns to make your email look more concise and powerful.

Sample Dialogue（情境範例）

　　Gary需要統整專案計畫書，寄送給相關部門，卻對郵件中應該如何稱呼、開場、結語詞、文法感到困惑，於是向Sabrina請教。

Gary：The game plan is ready to be sent. I’m planning to send it to you and Mark today. Should I cc Mr. Peterson (the head of department)? What should I do to fill every one in regarding the progress of the project?（我已經完成專案企畫書，預計今天寄給您與Mark。需要寄送副本給部門主管Mr. Peterson嗎？我應該如何同步更新專案進度訊息給各部門？）

以下是Gary預計發出的email內容——

Sabrina：Sending an email is an efficient way to keep all parties updated. However, there is some related etiquette you should be aware of before you send an email. If there are only two recipients then you should address them by name in the email instead of using the term ‘both’.  （透過email傳遞與更新訊息讓大家周知是很好的方式之一，只不過在發出email之前，應注意商用書信往來的禮儀。若收信者僅有兩位，建議收信者的名字應該出現於email中，盡量不要用both取代稱呼。）

　　I would also recommend that you use a standard greeting instead of ‘Good morning’. If the recipients are located in a different time zone(s) or the email reaches the recipients at a different time, then ‘Good morning’ would not be appropriate.（同時我也建議你使用常見的Greeting作為書信開頭，盡量避免使用Good morning。若是收信者在不同的國家或時區，或是收信者並非在上午開啟信件，那麼Good morning就會顯得很不恰當。）

　　Lastly, sending a carbon copy to Mr. Peterson is a must; we should always keep the department head updated of our progress. You should pay more attention to your tone and level of formality. A neutral tone could be used in both internal and external settings. I hope the edited version below can be useful for you.（最後，寄送信件副本給部門主管是必須的，我們應該隨時讓部門主管了解最新工作進度。你應該更加留意拿捏商用書信的語氣和形式。不論對內或對外，都應該使用中性語調。希望下面的修正版本對你有所幫助。）

　　您發現Gary在商用書信的口吻上犯了什麼錯誤嗎？下一期月刊中，將為您介紹Sabrina建議的版本，以及不可不知的商用書信禮儀。

＊備註：CC = Carbon Copy副本；BCC = Blind Carbon Copy密件副本

以上英文教學由EIE美語提供，英文課程諮詢請洽：EIE Institute Belle Yin（Tel: (02) 8773-6828 Ext. 368；Email: belle@eie.com.tw）

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